Monday, July 30, 2007

You know what grinds my gears?

What grinds my gears is the fact that I've been eaten alive by mozies, AGAIN!! Despite having bought this piece of crap...

If you ever feel the need to get a bug zapper, don't R DON'T!! waste your money on this piece of shit, all it has done is steal electricity!
I had a look in it about 5 mins ago and I actually saw a tiny bug in it. The damn thing must have broken out of it's egg and while looking for me died in mid flight, then fallen into the zapper already dead. The thing was minuscule, if I was someone who needed glasses then I would have had to go and find them and put them on to see this expired insect.
Since I got this piece of ARSE! I now have some wonderful mozie bites, 1 on a thigh, 1 on the belly, 2 on the same shoulder (front and back) and two on my FECKING face!!!!!!(nose end and cheek)
And they're all the size of a hens egg under the skin and itchy as FUCK!

Right, I have had this device on a counter top about 3 meters away from me, sitting on the same table while I do my blog and on the next pillow while I slept. The thing may as well have been on the dark side of the bleedin' moon!
I have been bitten at least 3 times in any one session since I bought this waste of carbon. Amazon can kiss my arse over this one.

There was another thing that grinds my gears but I can't think of it at the mo, it's been banished from my mind by these bloody itchy mozie bites!

On the up side, my Glock 23f arrives tomorrow, hurrah! Yes I know , you can't kill bugs with an airsoft gun. {sound of a buzzer indicating a wrong answer} except for this fool...
Who did this from the hip...
My hero. He's also a detective in the MET, so don't have nightmares.

Itchy good night to you all.
TTFN

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Just a few things:
Mozz = Morrissey = HOT, not mosquitoes.

Piece of arse = object of desire, sexual in nature, as in "He's a hot piece of ass."

And I adore Constable McNally. When Jim and I go on our honeymoon in London (we're not really) I'm going to invite you and Ian and his wife and babies over for tea. We'll listen to Morrissey and scratch mosquito bites.

Anonymous said...

so when you glock arrives will you be buying a black roll-neck sweater, sitting in a darkened room assembling and disassembling the gun with a blind-fold on.....are you about to go postal on the insect population of your house?

Have fun playing vigilanté in your living room.

Ashley

Ed said...

Hi peeps.
No, arse is bad, ass can be good, as you said "a hot piece of ass", but "this thing is arse!" is another way of saying it's crap,
And yes mozzie does stand for mosquito.

Hi Ash,
You ain't seen me. Right.

The bastard child of Gene Hunt said...

Mine is the most expensive fly swatter in Christendom. Useful and fun in one metal/ABS 32 round per second cyclic rate silenced package. Ah, life mimics art again.