Scary clown men at the tower part 2

So it's Saturday in Blackpool, the weather is a typical north-western spring, so it's dry but cold and blowy and the floor is wet. OK.

BUT

THE TOWER'S OPEN!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes that's right chums. Today I get to be a man.

No no no, today I get to go up Blackpool tower. Close I suppose.

Poor T. She has to deal with two 9 year olds every day and now on a weekend break away from them (she loves them more than oxygen by the way), she finds herself dealing with a half tonne shaven headed 7 year old. Poor girl.
Right, everyone please put your hands together for a beautiful and patient (17 years) woman. Ladies and gentlemen I give you (but not literally) , T...
the patient...
the thoughtful...
the gorgeous...
and above all, camera shy T
The only girl I want to grow ancient with.


So off we go, hand in hand (no really hand in hand) from our hotel, down the prom to the tower.
I don't know what is making me more giddy...
T's perfume and her (tiny) hand in mine,
The anticipation of the tower,
or the burger from the day before.
No it's defo the first two.

The Tower. Loads of Iron in various states, put together in a variety of ways and in a style that made this country famous (and a little feared) the world over. And I get to see it with T. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Look ladies and gents, if this gets too syrupy for you then tough, go read something else. The only girl I'd have wed is with me in Blackpool at the top of a lot of engineering. Things might get messy.

So we get in. The ticket is a bit on the pricey side, £12 something each for the adults, although I reckon I should have only paid the child rate, as I was the only 7 year old I saw up there.
On the up side the ticket does give you access to:-
1. The Tower
2. The Ballroom
3. The Aquarium
4. A 3D film show (not the worst I've ever seen)
5. {da, da, da da da, dum!} The Circus (god help us)

Now I wanted to strike a deal with the tower guardians and go up the tower twice and miss the circus. But T would have SULKED, look I'm not being nasty here, for real. I've seen what she gets like when she sulks. It's pretty but annoying. So off we go up the first lift.

The first lift drops you off at the level that you need to go and get the lift to the tower top. Did I mention that you have to go thru one of the most expensive cafes in the world?
Well you do. And at least one member of staff ( a young man who was either new to the job, or high, or both) gave us the worst directions ever (well T anyway, I was too excited to talk properly).
But we found the lift after only one false start. And this is what we saw at the top...
An old style phone box. Look kids, I've seen ones that are older and in better nick, at ground level in Birmingham. So I'm thinking £12 odd for this (remember I'm 7) cobblers.
But lets not forget the view, so here goes...
This next pic I remember seeing the place on Google Earth last year...
The skull and crossed bones indicates the semi-secret hideout of a large group of gougers and their instruments of doom (otherwise known to you and me as slot machines).

If you look from the tower in a landward direction you can see B+B's as far as the eye can see (on the day we went that's about a mile). No pics of that tho'.

Now here is the leap of faith, slightly marred by the fact that the weather had been less than dry and so lots of condensation had formed on the outside of the 2" glass sheet. I stood right in the middle looking down, with the soles of my feet tingling in that special way that screams at my brain that I'm very high up and can I stop being stupid now. T, along with several others jumped over the corner of it, rather than walk across it. But after a bit of gentle persuasion and the promise of a screaming fit by me if she didn't, T finally joined me on the glass, for about a nano second. Brave girl my T.


And now some video, yes it's true this gets better, I know you didn't think it possible but it does, here goes...



And here is some more video of much bigger ants...



The next sequence of photos are taken on the other levels. The main theme that I think they're going for is, "Red lead and Rust".
See what you think...
going up and down steps like these...
and these...
while trying to ignore the holes in the steelwork like this one...
Once you're on the top, or at least as high as the general public get to go, you see things like this...
and you also get to see things like this...
A stairway to heaven.
There is a balcony that is open but fenced in, so that you can walk around the outside and look at the inspiring views. Think Empire state just really really small and a bit grimy.

Anybody would think, reading this that I hated Blackpool, nothing could be further from the truth. I was loving it, just a bit upset over the general state of disrepair the tower and it's outbuildings seemed o be in. Shareholder profits above repair and investment, same the world over.

The top of the tower was well and truly done by myself and T, plus she was getting colder (poor little hothouse flower) so we decided to go down to the circus *flash of lightning* *roll of thunder* *dog howling in distance*
Unfortunately there are no pictures of that for two reasons:-

1. There is no photography of any kind allowed in the circus.
2. The battery in my camera had lost it's charge, rats.

And I was shaking too much in fear of the clowns, it's OK I was quite safe as T was there to protect me.

The acts where as follows:-

• Mooky the clown and his soldier friend
  
• A trapeze act from China
• Jugglers from a European country
• A troupe of "African" tumblers
• Some Russian tumblers
• A balancing act from the UK
• A girl who spun and balanced on a swinging Trapeze
• and a rubber boy from Brazil
  

Only the Russian lads where disappointing, just needed to practice their act a bit more.

The clown picked on a bloke sitting opposite T and me and I breathed a sigh of relief. Poor bloke had to sing the words to "Bob the Builder". But in my head I was playing out a scene from Orwell's 1984 but twisted so that it had me and the other bloke in and I was screaming "Take him, Take him..."

After the intermission the acts resumed and near the end the lights went out and two spotlights came on, each pointing to opposite sides of the seating.
To my HORROR I found myself illuminated by one of the beams.
My mind began to race along with my heart rate. The fight or flight response became very strong.
The clown was going to get ME!!!
Yet still I sat there, obviously my body had decided against the flee option and had gone for the fight option, it looked like I was going to save untold thousands by killing a clown.

They (the clowns) where making bird calls using those whistle things that sit in the mouth, I remember having one as a kid. Then across the ring I could see the soldier clown at the back of the crowd. Oh CRAP! the scary one is behind me!
I can feel him getting closer and closer as the bird calls continue, my hands now two sweaty fists, my body tensed for the pre-emptive attack.

But NO! he goes past me and on to the circus floor. I'm so relieved I almost run off my seat like water. I'm so relieved in fact that I can't remember much of the act except that it ends in some sort of bizarre bird like gay marriage.

Lights out
lights on

The performance area is cleared and the floor drops down then starts to fill with water, all the acts walk around the edge and wave while some music plays and a fountain does it's bit in the middle.
The show ends and we all leave via the gift shop.
I survived.

We go down stairs T and me, to see the aquarium. It's not too bad at all we spend a while there looking at various fish and marine critters.
One in particular caught my eye, I can't remember it's name but it was South American, 18" top to bottom, a little over 2' in length and looked just like a piranha. Turns out it's a cousin of the piranha, but this evil looking thing only eats fruit and veg. Still I wouldn't like to put that to the test.

We finally leave the tower and it's environs and decide to go for a wander in the town. but that's another story.

TTFN

Next entry:-"Meditations on scary clown men from the tower"